Reports of mass shortages of tin foil, large numbers of Ruckers forum members thrown into mass panic.
Special flight laid on to keep the beenshits tin foil hat at maximum wrap. Other conspiracy nutters are left to battle through with toilet paper as their only option. It wont stop the evil rays getting through but at least they will have something to wipe the shit off their chins.
In other news a link has been found between stupidity and tin foil hat wearers but it is not known yet if it is stupidity that makes them wear tin foil hats or its the tin foil hats making them stupid. Public opinion is going for the first option