Church of RooiTit And Porker (CRAP) - Sunday 9 Nov . . .

Good morning parishioners, and welcome again to the Church of RooiTit And Porker, where we congregate every Sunday after a test match to praise our glorious Springboks.

Another wonderful victory delivered by Rassie, Pieter-Steph, Sacha, Marx, St Esterhuizen.and all our other brave and wonderful Springboks.

How sweet it was sticking it to the fucking Frogs after all their whining. Sacha is the True Son of Springbok rugby, Pieter-Steph as always was a tireless warrior while Malcolm Marx was back to his imperious best.

Let us pray . . .

Our Rassie, who art our coach, Befok be thy name. Thy victories come, Thy will be done by Siya, Pieter-Steph and Sacha. Give us next year another RWC win and forgive those that besmirch your great name as we forgive those same stupid fucking cunts. And lead us not into complacency but deliver us more trophies. For we are the Springboks, the world's number one, forever and ever . . .

A-fucking-men.

It's hard to believe there are still Rassie heretics out there but - once again - the stupid fucking cunts have even more egg all over their sneering faces. Take joy in picturing these sad fucking excuses for Springbok supporters getting all red-faced and tearful when the mighty Springboks - a point and a man down at half time - smote the Frogs and plundered their city. Picture these same losers rubbing their hands with glee as Lood was sent off and then picture them sputtering in disbelief as the Springboks demonstrated to the Frogs the difference between being World Champions and being a whiny bunch of crybabies.

(Laughter)

(More laughter)

Haha, yes. It is indeed funny to imagine the Rassie-bashers waking up this morning and re-living the horror. You'd think they would have converted to the Church of RooiTit And Porker by now! Poor suckers.

Please open your hymn books to number 23 and let us sing our praises . . . and with Bokmas coming up, perhaps a Bokmas carol . . .

Hark the herald angels sing

Glory to the new born king

Sacha has arrived in style

CRAP and sinners reconciled

How's this for a good idea

Make him captain after Siya

Hark the herald angels sing

Glory to the new born king.

Thank you. Today's reading is from the book of Prophets, chapter 32 verse 17 . . .

And yea it shall come to pass that not just one but two kings shall appear, one in the backline and one in the pack. Verily the backline king shall make his mark that none shall doubt him but the forward shall take longer to manifest his glory due to injury . . . and Cam shall be His name.

Thanks for your attendance this morning. See you all next week . . . and if you know any sad and stupid cunt who still bitches about Rassie, urge him to attend our Sunday services so we can enlighten him. We at CRAP live to give.

Bokke!!!

A-fucking-men!

Preacher RooiTit, this sermon screams one thing, you seriously need to get laid.

That plumbing’s been blocked longer than a French scrum:)

You losers got called out. Suck it up snowflake!

Amen

Our backline is lethal, the strongest in the professional era - particularly with Sasha on the pitch.

The try he scored by cutting the backline, where he looped around Libbok, was fantastic.

This backline gets even better with Fassi back at 15, Willemse at 12 and one of Moodie, JJ or Hooker at 13. Williams needs to be restored back to the starting side

Imagine adding Hanekom and Roos to the pack equation as well

"This backline gets even better with Fassi back at 15, Willemse at 12 and one of Moodie, JJ or Hooker at 13. Williams needs to be restored back to the starting side

Imagine adding Hanekom and Roos to the pack equation as well"

A-fucking-men!

For someone that was done with Ruckers, Whining like a little Bitch, Preacher RooiTit is very vocal with his pure Bull Shit Sermon ….A-fucking-men! :)

Puff puff you seem to have forgotten your armbands

Thanks Davie, I will put on my Ducklings now:)

Plug your brain in also - or is it already plugged in?

Delande is a solid player, good at organising the defence on the inside channel - but Esterhuizen is a better all-round player. Perhaps start Esterhuizen and move him to loose forward later in the game, and then bring on Willemse.

Or start Willemse and perhaps replace him later in the match with Esterhuizen.

Jessie Kriel is great on defence, just solid on attack. Not really a world beater, but Moodie has not really set the world alight when playing at 13 - at least so far.

Delande is the player most under threat. We need an inside centre that runs off Sasha to give more options on attack. When Sasha makes a clean break, we never see Delande keeping up with the play.

Hanekom is needed at number 6 - an all-round loose like Duane Vermuelen.

Wiese has improved his breakdown game, making him a more all-around player - not just a ball carrier.

Roos is more of a ball carrier who can link with backs; he can go missing when the game gets tight.

No Esterhuizen is 31 move on

We have had enough of DA/ AE/ Am and Jessie at centre

Time to move on - inject some attacking clout outside Sacha and Libbok and complement Kolbe, Arendse, Edwil and Fassi out wide

We might see Roos at 12 after all...in this hybrid era.

Amen!

31 is fine. We have Reinach at 35 in the form of his life. I would be more worried about Reinach not making the 2027 world cup.

What happened to Faff? Is he over. His box kicks are not very good, but the rest of his game is.

Williams has the best box kick, so in some ways starting him would be better - but he injects fast tempo off the bench once the game opens up near the end.

Rassie's options in the backline is mind boggling, we've never ever had this luxury.

Eina….‘are mind boggling’….quick edit it I won’t expose you.

"Eina….‘are mind boggling’….quick edit it I won’t expose you."

Seriously, just how childish is this ancient old relic?

Quick, hurry up Dense . . . otherwise you'll be "exposed" . . . by the semi-literate old fool who can't spell basic words himself . . . do you feel the fear?

LMAO!

But I wasn’t the one who thought they were going to cram 50% of his favorite book into 10% of the remaining time in a series. Talk about stupid.

‘’ROFL!

It's time for enlightened posters to declare for the Church of RooiTit And Porker.

Our church has 4 very simple beliefs . . .

1. Two time RWC-winner Rassie Erasmus is a great Springbok rugby coach.

1. Two time World Rugby Player of the Year Pieter-Steph du Toit is one of the all time great Springboks.

1. Two time RWC-winning captain Siya Kolisi is a great captain and a world class flanker worth his place in the team on merit

1. DW is a #12.

If you agree with at least three of the fundamental tenets of CRAP then fucking speak up and declare for the Church of RooiTit And Porker.

In the name of Springbok rugby,

A-fucking-men!

...it appears as though DDA is your Gnostic Gospels.

The thread that, if tugged at a little, threatens to sink the Church.

Learn from the mistakes of Christianity and embrace DDA.