FIXTURESNo upcoming fixtures — check back soon.
FORUM / RUGBY /  Christmas gifts for some challenged Bok candidates

Christmas gifts for some challenged Bok candidates

Started by Mozart16 REPLIES371 VIEWS· 13 Dec 2014, 16:31
SHAREXFACEBOOKWHATSAPPTELEGRAMREDDITLINKEDIN
MO
MozartCaptain49,914 posts
13 Dec 2014, 16:31
#1
13 Dec 2014, 16:31#1

Mvovo.....a part with lines in some important Bok play

 

Goosen.... a reset button to take him back to 2012

 

Steppie.....boots that also allow him to step off the left foot.

 

 

De Allende....a cattle prod that moves him forward when the opposition have the ball

 

 

JJ....a seat he can attach to the tackled player while he is taking a ride.

 

 

Lambie ....sunglasses for those lambie in the headlights moments

 

Raainach....a small beeper that tells him the ball is coming out the ruck

 

 

Hougaard....a few more years in scrum half school

 

Coenie....a compass that aligns him north/south in the scrums as opposed to west/east.

 

Nyakane....a wake up it's the first scrum zapper

 

Malherbe....injury insurance

 

Bismarck....the return of his Superman cape

 

Lomp....an electric razor for the upper lip catastrophe and a make over.

 

Coetzee.....fetching mitts

 

Mohoje.....friends with influence

 

 

BI
biltongbekClub Pro749 posts
13 Dec 2014, 16:49
#2
13 Dec 2014, 16:49#2

Vicki some muscles

Fourie du Preez some imagination

JP Pietersen some speed

Ruan Pienaar a quick mind

Morne Steyn some vision

Frans Steyn a new attitude

Jean de Villiers a pass

Jannie du Plessis a medical practice

Beast a new lease on life

Jaque Fourie a thank you for retiring card

Bakkies Botha a thank you for retiring card


And last but not least for Heyneke Meyer - a clue and the location of the fountain of youth as he will nee d that more than anything.

 

MO
MozartCaptain49,914 posts
13 Dec 2014, 16:54
#3
13 Dec 2014, 16:54#3
Gosh and there I was thinking HM needed a new display cabinet for the RW Cup! 
CL
clevermikeCoach57,555 posts
13 Dec 2014, 16:59
#4
13 Dec 2014, 16:59#4
 Lets add a few for the ebnefit of players Mozart left out
Pietersen -  a speed training machine to get him back the pace he lost
Jean de Villiers - a get-well-soon card
Francois Steyn - A book on dieting for habitual Fatso's plus a speed training machine and a manual on how to play rugby at center.
Morne Steyn - A manual on how to play rugby to ensure his contact with Stade Francais is not terminated before expiry.
Willem Alberts -  A book on dieting for habitual Fatso's plus a speed training machine and a manual on how to play rugby at loosie
Matfield -  An advisory book on why players should not play rugby when they are way past it and retire gracefully before they discredit themselves totally.
Jannie du Plessis - An advisory from Venter on when and how to start a surgery.
Heineke Meyer -  A card wishing him well for 2006 - since in rugby terms according to  him it is still 2005 and rugbyhas nit movd on - plus a book on evaluation of performnces of rugby players.   
Mozart -  A card wishing him well for 2008 - since in rugby terms according to  him it is still 2007 and rugbyhas nit movd on.   


 
MO
MozartCaptain49,914 posts
13 Dec 2014, 19:08
#5
13 Dec 2014, 19:08#5
Oh. I forgot

For Jordaan a Robbie Fruean doll to dominate
And for Lappies Labuschagne a thick pair of briefs for all those splinters he might get on the Bools bench.  
MO
MozartCaptain49,914 posts
13 Dec 2014, 19:09
#6
13 Dec 2014, 19:09#6
And for Marniks Boshoff a set of sights to use in CC finals.  
DB
DbDraadCaptain26,388 posts
13 Dec 2014, 23:41
#7
13 Dec 2014, 23:41#7
 Moz Marnitz is better than that game, way better. I'm sure he will still play for the Boks. IMO he is better than Bambie... In my book, Pat will remain a 15.
MO
MozartCaptain49,914 posts
13 Dec 2014, 23:55
#8
13 Dec 2014, 23:55#8
Cloudy   I have one for Julian Savea.....a kers  system that gives him the gas he needs to stay ahead of the mighty Eagles when given a free run to the line.
MO
MozartCaptain49,914 posts
14 Dec 2014, 00:13
#9
14 Dec 2014, 00:13#9
Well I didn't like the way he ran right over Hendricks....he could at least made some pretence of side stepping him. 
MO
MozartCaptain49,914 posts
14 Dec 2014, 00:24
#10
14 Dec 2014, 00:24#10
 Well maybe a taser for Hendricks to handle the bigger chaps. Or perhaps a ref that wouldn't yellow card him for a perfectly legal ball contest.
CL
clevermikeCoach57,555 posts
14 Dec 2014, 00:36
#11
14 Dec 2014, 00:36#11
 And another for Willm Alberts - a book on how to takle nackline players withpout landing on your own backsie.
Juan De Jongh -  A book of advie how not to go AWOL in rugbty tests and how to avid missing key tackles .  
MO
moolaaPro2,380 posts
14 Dec 2014, 01:25
#12
14 Dec 2014, 01:25#12
 Moz, they all have their embarrassing moments. Think Brodie Retallick bouncing back off Morne like a rag doll last year!!
sharkbok
sharkbokCaptain23,286 posts
14 Dec 2014, 01:39
#13
14 Dec 2014, 01:39#13
 A time-machine for Meyer so he can import the Bulls class of 2007 to the current era.
Beuden Barrett is wishing for a portable floating toilet in case he has to defend the 5 metre line against Pollard, and craps himself (again). 


HA
hakwaPro4,146 posts
14 Dec 2014, 05:03
#14
14 Dec 2014, 05:03#14
 Hahahahahahahahaha Classic Mozart hehehehehe Below are my best bits LOL

Mvovo.....a part with lines in some important Bok play

 

De Allende....a cattle prod that moves him forward when the opposition have the ball

 

JJ....a seat he can attach to the tackled player while he is taking a ride.

 

Lambie ....sunglasses for those lambie in the headlights moments

 

Raainach....a small beeper that tells him the ball is coming out the ruck

 

Coenie....a compass that aligns him north/south in the scrums as opposed to west/east.

 

Nyakane....a wake up it's the first scrum zapper

 

Bismarck....the return of his Superman cape


Mohoje.....friends with influence

HA
hakwaPro4,146 posts
14 Dec 2014, 05:06
#15
14 Dec 2014, 05:06#15
  Biltongbek I like these ones from you

Jannie du Plessis a medical practice


Bakkies Botha a thank you for retiring card


Heyneke Meyer - a clue and the location of the fountain of youth



HA
hakwaPro4,146 posts
14 Dec 2014, 05:08
#16
14 Dec 2014, 05:08#16
 and Cloudy
SA
Saffolk Captain30,741 posts
14 Dec 2014, 14:28
#17
14 Dec 2014, 14:28#17
Matfield  - directions to a retirement village and a reality check.
Meyer - a rugby brain and some balls
Bakkies and Fourie - conviction to stick with their decision to retire. One way ticket out of test rugby
Morne - a French  test cap
de Jongh  - 10kg 
Louw - a loss of 10kg so he fits the fetcher role
Jannie - a GP practice of his own
Alberts - some smelling salts
Steenkamp - a hobby 
Pienaar - a pair of balls
du Preez - direction to the try line
Jean - a speedy recovery and retirement from test rugby
Hendricks - the art of tackling
Schalk - rewind button
— END OF THREAD —

More from Rugby

More news